Burros for Heroes Store
Welcome to the loud side of the Burros for Heroes store. Karnage Korps is built for everyone who survived the late 1900s, still remembers old-school character art, and knows that bad knees, worse coffee, tangled straps, and a little sarcasm can still show up for a good cause.
Meet the characters, read the backstories, and shop the shirts that bring the whole Korps to life.
Karnage Korps brings Veteran humor, first responder grit, blue-collar chaos, and throwback character energy into one collection. Every purchase helps support the Burros for Heroes mission serving Veterans, families, first responders, rescued animals, and community connection.
Veteran Khaos
A little Army grit, a little joint-service humor, and a whole lot of late-1900s attitude.
Vet Dude carries the classic Army Veteran spirit. Bad coffee, worse chow, long days, loud opinions, and more good ideas than anyone should be asked to remember.
He represents the Veterans who keep showing up, keep helping others, and still know how to laugh at the chaos.
Vet Dudette brings Army grit, sharp wit, and exactly zero patience for nonsense. She has held her own, handled business, and stayed calm while everyone else acted brand new.
She represents service, strength, humor, and the kind of confidence that does not need permission.
Branch Khaos
Military-inspired characters built around branch jokes, field problems, trail dust, and memories that probably still need ibuprofen.
Rick is pure Army ruck-march misery. He lives somewhere between almost there and who packed this thing.
Rita brings Army trail grit. She already tightened the straps, checked the pace, and judged everyone’s packing choices.
On the trail, Grill Sergeant brings Army command presence, sharp eyes, and zero patience for excuses from three switchbacks away.
He believes every hill is character development, every muddy boot is a lesson, and every complaint gets drink water and move out.
Chad is Air Force all the way. He knows the mission matters, but morale improves when the chair has lumbar support.
Chelsea brings Air Force precision, sharp side-eye, and the kind of confidence that survives any staff meeting.
Carl brings Marine Corps volume, questionable snacks, and the kind of confidence only red crayon energy can provide.
Carla shows up loud, locked in, and absolutely certain that the best plan starts with momentum and maybe a green crayon.
Drown is Navy through and through. He keeps the watch, checks the gear, and still looks surprised when water acts like water.
Sue brings Navy sonar focus. She hears everything, misses nothing, and can detect nonsense long before it surfaces.
Callie brings Space Force energy, big ideas, bigger charts, and a flight path that may or may not include reality.
Cody is cleared for launch, mostly focused, and definitely not reading the checklist out of order.
First Responder Khaos
Fire Department, law enforcement, EMS, nurses, and doctors all get their turn in the Korps.
Bob is Fire Department grit in full turnout mode. Every call has a plan until the door opens and the plan needs a new plan.
Heather brings hose-line focus, turnout gear attitude, and a look that says someone parked where they should not have.
Pete is patrol-unit chaos with a badge. He stays calm on the radio and suspicious of anything that starts with this should be quick.
Mandy brings law enforcement calm, sharp timing, and the ability to make silence feel like a tactical decision.
Sam is EMS shift-life in motion. He has heard every siren, dodged every bad driver, and still asked if anyone brought snacks.
Tess is EMS triage chaos with a clipboard. She sorts the mess, keeps the line moving, and somehow knows who needs help first.
Betty is nurse-station survival mode. She can hear a bed alarm from another zip code and still beat everyone else down the hall.
Cal is nursing-floor cardio. He answers the call light, the second call light, and the room that said they were fine.
Paige is doctor-on-call panic in cartoon form. The pager never brings good news, but she shows up and handles business anyway.
Chuck is doctor paperwork overload. He survived the patient notes, the update, and the email asking for the same update again.
Trades Khaos
Electricians, plumbers, operators, concrete breakers, and dirt-work legends who know every easy job has a surprise hiding in it.
Brad knows which breaker should be off, which one actually is off, and why everyone needs to stop touching things.
Sally brings the tester, the tools, and the look that says someone definitely skipped the safety brief.
Penny shows up with a wrench, a plan, and no interest in hearing how it was fixed last time.
Dave has seen things, smelled things, and fixed things that polite society refuses to discuss.
Dusty moves earth, makes noise, and believes a little mud means progress is finally happening.
Tess can dig, swing, lift, and make everyone else step back just a little farther.
Jack turns noise into progress and calls it a quiet morning if nobody complains before lunch.
Sheila knows the shovel is not the problem. The problem is whoever said this would only take a minute.
More to Follow
More characters, more trades, more service humor, and more late-1900s Khaos are coming as the Burros for Heroes Store grows.
Shop the Full StoreKarnage Korps is part of the Burros for Heroes Store. Merchandise sales help support the mission and raise awareness for Veterans, families, first responders, rescued animals, and community connection.